sadashivan
Qualified Rookie
offline
Registered: Sep 2004
Local time: 03:07 AM
Location: India
Posts: 15
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Marriage and Dream: Marriage is portrayed as fortune that people wait anxiously for moment to enter married life. Celebrations and custom rituals add up spice to more tasteful marriage. Dreams to have identity as own family and children and who should I live with are the first choice. Each one whether man or woman has a dream and anticipation for his/her future partner that he/ she should look like this and etc. The dream what is stored in self is LOVE. The dream that comes true is the luck for one but normally dream does not come true in many cases, so has to satisfy with what got as partner. There is a lot of difference in external look and the experiences of practical life. My experiences contacting couples reflects both are opposite to each other in behavior, in many incidences this behavioral change contributes to uncomfortable positions for each other. Behavioral change in a man or woman is caused by the character possessed and the role played in the house, which creates the environment to act and react. For example, requirement of a woman is the necessities to run the family and man’s is to arrange those needs. Both are different objectives though for one purpose, woman will not be able to run a house without the required arranged by man. Besides this role, man and woman have an important role of emotional and physical care for each other. Giving importance to partner’s role and involving intensely to play his/her role in the house promotes understanding each other. Intense involvement in the family motivates to sacrifice many problems of married life. Major points as I feel for both husband and wife to keep married life intact are:
1. Dreams are far-far away from the real life, so accepting truth would benefit in real life.
2. High expectation from the partner is root to disappointments and frictions. Treat the partner as human.
3. Deep involvement of a partner in the family affairs keeps away the attention elsewhere. Efforts to be to involve the partner emotionally and physically.
4. Respect the identity and integrity of a partner. This develops likeness, understanding, and submission emotionally.
5. Emotional and physical care of the partner is the magnet for pulling attention.
6. Sexual attraction is a tool to pull partner towards you. It is as necessary as food and water for healthy couple, enough and delicious sexual life at home would discourage looking for alternate.
http://www.sadashivan.com/marriaged...nfails/id2.html
Marriage and partner’s behaviour: Each person has own character and quality, the individuality identifies when reflected through communication and practice. Major characters which effect married life are Negative/ Positive, Introverted/ extroverted and strong/ weak, these characters control us. In some negative dominates and in some positive dominates, and what dominates reveals through reaction. As I observed, there is almost no house where wife says my husband is perfect also the opinion of husband is same for his wife. So one has to agree as no one is perfect, need an endeavour to work for the objective of marriage. Strength of marriage lies on how you understand and react to the partner’s behaviour. If both partners understand each other, react in accordance would avoid clashes and violence. In each house there is opinion differences; to manage is the quality of both partners:
1. To extinguish fire, water or other cool substance is the solution. To be cool when find possibility of arguments and settle the mater in right environment. Arguments become clash and then differences in the partnership only accelerates distasteful married life, is one of the reasons of infidelity.
2. Many couples do not like each other’s odour rather can not stand, in such cases during sleep any important discussion may result to arguments. Because is already irritated by the distaste of odour to give positive response.
3. Many small-pity incidences like he/she does not dress well, very slow, does not clean well, does not smile, talk too much or too serious and etc, etc, together form a big consolidated issue, when minded and stored in self stimulates dislike towards partner.
4. In many houses, beginning of arguments cursing each other for not doing this or done that, is normally stimulated by development of dislike of prior incidences. In such families dominant person’s ego of being efficient and intelligent pursues partner to act accordingly. Such characters are too extroverted and negative which prevents them calculating others mind. They have a feeling what they think is right. No one is same and each one has intelligence but in different forms, one is good at kitchen and other in arranging. Avoiding comparison softens relation.
5. Women are more emotional than men. Women use heart to think and Men use brain. So women need emotional touch up, attention and presence recognized.
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"Environment is surrounding atmosphere/ condition for existence" - "Environment is an essential natural process or an outcome of occurrence" – "Environment is of two types, one is negative and the other is positive" |
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09-20-2007 06:14 PM
