no clue which SP member wrote it, but it is great
TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE RESULTS NIGHT
Twas the night before results night and all through AI,
The beast was stirring, just waiting to make them all cry.
The singers had practiced on the stage with great care,
In hope that the judges soon would be there.
The audience was nestled all snug in their threads,
While visions of great performances danced in their heads.
And Randy in his jewelry and Simon in his T,
Had just settled in when Paul said, "Oh I gotta pee!!"
When out on the stage there arose such a clatter,
We sprang from our seats to see what was the matter,
Away to the isle I flew in a flash,
To see Taylor make his entrance, he came out in a dash!
The lights on his hair showed a new fallen glow,
It gave a lustre of bright silver to objects below.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear?
It was Taylor dancing like mad, nearly stripping a gear.
With his moves so lively and oh so quick,
I knew in a moment this was Soul Patrol's pick.
More rapid than eagles his competition they came,
And he whistled and shouted, and called them by name:
Hey Elliott! Hey Katharine and Ace to name a few,
Hey Paris! Hey Kellie and yes Chris too!
To the front of the stage and on out to the hall,
Please take Simon outta here, please take him all!!
As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane came,
When he met the soulman, he called him by name.
So up through the building the singers they flew,
With their fans they grabbed Simon - and took him away too!
And then in a twinkling, I heard on the stage,
It was Ryan coming off in a violent rage.
As I drew in my breath and was turning around,
Back down the isle came Simon, he came with a bound.
He was dressed all in fur from his head to his foot,
And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot.
A bundle of tight T shirts he had flung on his back.
And he looked like a dunce when opening his pack.
His eyes how they glared, His jaw how it twitched.
His cheeks like a chipmunk, HE WAS BEWITCHED!!!
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a fool.
His face was just ugly, it really wasn't cool!
The stump of a stogie he held tight in his teeth.
And the smoke, it encircled his head like a wreath.
He had a broad face and a protruding round belly,
That shook when he laughed like a bowl full of jelly.
He was chubby and plump, a right grouchy old elf,
And I snarled when I saw him in spite of myself.
The glare in his eye and a twist of his head,
Soon gave all the singers something to dread.
He spoke mean things to all and went right to his work,
And talked rudely and nasty, then turned with a jerk.
And laying his finger up aside of his nose,
And giving a nod, cross the stage he rose.
He sprang to his limo, to his driver gave a whistle.
And away he flew like the down of a thistle.
But I heard him exclaim ere he drove out of sight,
I'm worried Taylor will win this - HE WAS AWESOME TONIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"Levon" - took back the comment that Taylor wouldn't "make it", said he's "interesting", told him he received more comments from people outside the show about Taylor than any other contestant.
"Easy" - He said that if Taylor re-watched it, he'd see it was "average".
"Takin It To The Streets" - Loved the song, said "that's what it's all about- having fun & being memorable", thought it was the best of the night.
"Living For The City" - Yes, he did say that it was like a drunken father at a wedding, but he also said, "The difference is... YOU can sing!"
"Not Fade Away" - He said it was a "complete & utter mess"
"Trouble" - He "rather liked the song", an "excellent vocal". (so he didn't like the clothes- I didn't either)
"Country Roads" - "safe, boring, and lazy"
"You Send Me" - beginning was "lame cabaret", then *SNAP* "Magic"
"Just Once" - "lounge act"
"Play That Funky Music" - "another horrible wedding performance".
"Something" - Said in all his (Taylor's) barminess, it's easy to forget that he's a really good singer.
04-17-2006 09:00 PM
Dat was fun.
