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esskay
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"parents" who should be punished.. post #1  quote:



Everyone has seen parents do something jaw-droppingly shocking to their kids either in public or private that just, plain shouldn't be allowed. Some things are no-brainers like sexual abuse, but others walk a fine line between right & wrong and push the envelope of constitutional/civil rights.

One that gets me every time is watching parents drive around with their kids unrestrained, jumping around and tossing about in the back seat.. or the front seat for that matter. I see this happen ALL THE TIME and it makes me so angry that they can be so oblivious to the mortal danger into which they place their kids. Somehow they think that the padded interior of their Mercedes SUV combined with airbags and antilock brakes will make a perfectly cushy environment for an unrestrained child to bounce around in the event of an emergency. Realistically, I think these "parents" should be arrested on sight and their children placed into protective custody until the parent satisfactorily completes some sort of child safetly course. If only we civilians could do something about it without being faced with penalties for taking the law into our own hands..

Other parents who fall into the same safety failure category as above include those who:

* Leave their children unatended
* Allow their kids access to unsafe cleansers, chemicals, sharp and/or hot objects, etc at home and elsewhere
* Others?

Physical abuse including hitting, excessively rough handling, or otherwise intentionally inflicting pain on kids in order to teach them a lesson is WRONG. I think that in some situations there is a place for spanking, especially where safety is involved and it is important to make a strong impression on a mind that is otherwise incapable of reasoning. But beyond that I don't believe in it. In my opinion, the only lesson learned from physical abuse is that my parents will hurt me if I don't follow the letter of their word; the letter of their word sucks, doesn't make any sense, and they must like hurting me.

I guess the point of this thread is for parents who anonymously view this and realize that they do something which other parents recognize as being bad choice to have an opportunity to perform a little self-evaluation..


Old Post 09-29-2003 05:37 AM
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Re: "parents" who should be punished.. post #2  quote:

Originally posted by Sean Kelly
Everyone has seen parents do something jaw-droppingly shocking to their kids either in public or private that just, plain shouldn't be allowed. Some things are no-brainers like sexual abuse, but others walk a fine line between right & wrong and push the envelope of constitutional/civil rights.

One that gets me every time is watching parents drive around with their kids unrestrained, jumping around and tossing about in the back seat.. or the front seat for that matter. I see this happen ALL THE TIME and it makes me so angry that they can be so oblivious to the mortal danger into which they place their kids. Somehow they think that the padded interior of their Mercedes SUV combined with airbags and antilock brakes will make a perfectly cushy environment for an unrestrained child to bounce around in the event of an emergency. Realistically, I think these "parents" should be arrested on sight and their children placed into protective custody until the parent satisfactorily completes some sort of child safetly course. If only we civilians could do something about it without being faced with penalties for taking the law into our own hands..


You can do something about it! If you have a cell phone call the police and tell them the license plate number and tell them what you see....thats about all you can do...what they do about it depends on the individual department....I know mine will take action.

Other parents who fall into the same safety failure category as above include those who:

* Leave their children unatended
* Allow their kids access to unsafe cleansers, chemicals, sharp and/or hot objects, etc at home and elsewhere
* Others?

Physical abuse including hitting, excessively rough handling, or otherwise intentionally inflicting pain on kids in order to teach them a lesson is WRONG. I think that in some situations there is a place for spanking, especially where safety is involved and it is important to make a strong impression on a mind that is otherwise incapable of reasoning. But beyond that I don't believe in it. In my opinion, the only lesson learned from physical abuse is that my parents will hurt me if I don't follow the letter of their word; the letter of their word sucks, doesn't make any sense, and they must like hurting me.

I guess the point of this thread is for parents who anonymously view this and realize that they do something which other parents recognize as being bad choice to have an opportunity to perform a little self-evaluation..


Its amazing how many people leave their kids unattended, especially at the casino! I have been told by some of the servers at some of the casino restaurants that people have left their kids in the restaurant to do as they please while they go in the casino and gamble....its truly the most pathetic thing I have ever seen parents do....talk about an addiction that leaves them to make terrible choices! I can only imagine these kids....kids with nothing because their parents spent all of their food and clothes money at the casino....its them that need to be turned in for neglect!!!

As for the parents that hit their children in abusive ways.....PATHETIC.....these are the same kids we have to deal with later in life when they have turned to criminal behavior. (not all kids turn out that way...but the majority of them do!)

Hopefully people will realize the wrong in it...but for people that abuse children, those people need help.....if they dont recognize their problem, the only ones that suffer are the kids....maybe bystanders who also read this will know when its time to say "when" and take action against such people. We need to protect the children!


Old Post 09-29-2003 05:58 AM
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chelktty
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post #3  quote:

JACKSONVILLE, Florida (AP) -- A 2-year-old left alone for nearly three weeks while her mother was behind bars survived by eating mustard, ketchup, rice and raw pasta, police said.

The toddler was watching cartoons when found by her father, police said Monday. She was suffering from malnutrition and was being treated at Wolfson Children's Hospital, police said.

Dakeysha Lee, 22, was charged Monday with child abuse because she didn't let anyone know that her daughter was alone in her apartment, police said. She was jailed Sept. 10 on unrelated charges.

Ogden Lee, who is separated from the girl's mother, said he talked to her by telephone at the jail Sunday and she said their daughter was with neighbors.

When he got into the apartment, the youngster had dragged food and toys into her mother's bedroom and was lying in a baby's bathtub. She was covered with dried ketchup, Lee said.

"She grabbed me and wouldn't let go of me," Lee said. "It is really a miracle how good a shape my daughter is in. I don't know how she did it."


WHY DOES FLORIDA AUTOMATICALLY GIVE CUSTODY TO THE MOTHERS?????


Old Post 09-30-2003 02:36 PM
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post #4  quote:

quote:
Originally posted by chelktty
WHY DOES FLORIDA AUTOMATICALLY GIVE CUSTODY TO THE MOTHERS?????


I dont know about Florida....but Im not really big on picking a parent based on gender alone. I think the basis for where the kids go to depends on who can care for them best.

This was a really sad article...thank goodness this girl was found before she died from malnutrition or anything else. There is no telling what kind of things can happen to a two-year old child...their minds havent developed enough to know whats dangerous and what isnt.....

This mother definitely needs to not have custody of this child.

I do think in many states picking a parent based on gender is changing.....there have been cases here where the kids have been given to the fathers for the reason they were shown to be better providers. Thats the way it SHOULD work.


Old Post 09-30-2003 05:21 PM
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chelktty
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post #5  quote:

quote:
Originally posted by mystic


I do think in many states picking a parent based on gender is changing.....there have been cases here where the kids have been given to the fathers for the reason they were shown to be better providers. Thats the way it SHOULD work.


I agree 100%. It's sad to think that so many counties in the U.S. still use gender bias when determining the custodial residence of a child. I read a mission statement from a father's rights advocate attorney in Tampa, Florida that read: "Mother's are not better parents, they are just OTHER parents" How true indeed.
The bias is changing in many States, but unfortunately it is still in a primitive stage of judicial and political evolution.


Old Post 09-30-2003 06:15 PM
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Kookaburra
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post #6  quote:

Parents who allow their children to drink alcohol should be punished. I'm not talking about the parents who can't control what their kids do while outside the house. I'm talking about the parents who deliberately buy alcohol for their underaged kids.

Some also purchase cigarrettes and drugs for them.

I realize what goes on in a person's home is their business, but to get a child started on acquiring the taste of alcohol seems very irrisponsible.


Old Post 10-01-2003 04:30 AM
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Barbed wire
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post #7  quote:

quote:
Originally posted by Kookaburra
Parents who allow their children to drink alcohol should be punished. I'm not talking about the parents who can't control what their kids do while outside the house. I'm talking about the parents who deliberately buy alcohol for their underaged kids.

Some also purchase cigarrettes and drugs for them.

I realize what goes on in a person's home is their business, but to get a child started on acquiring the taste of alcohol seems very irrisponsible.



If alcohol consumption isn't usual in a family, children won't drink outside their home
And, children should be taught be parents to resist bad influence, it's necessary not only because of drugs.

I can imagine who are the people who buy alcohol or even drugs for their children!


Old Post 10-01-2003 09:25 AM
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post #8  quote:

Haha... I know parents who buy CRACK for their kids... and condoms! Pathetic, really.

Sean, federal child safety law mandates that kids be buckled in. If a police officer catches your kids without belts on, you can be arrested. I don't suggest calling in a license plate, though, as nothing can really be done about it if an officer doesn't see it.

With hitting... I don't think there is ANY context under which physical punishment is needed. My views are a bit skewed, I suppose, as my parents just love to beat me up, and I deal with kids almost daily who are physically abused. Any form of physical punishment for anything sends a message that hitting is OK (with younger children) and that you like to hurt your kid (in older children). If a strong statement must be made, make it strong... but don't hit.

NOW, heres an addition to the list: parents who let their kids squirm all over the place and disturb people in church... and parents who let their kids sit and cry their lungs out. Goodness, if your kid is crying, TAKE THEM OUT TO THE CRY-ROOM!


Old Post 10-13-2003 07:29 AM
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post #9  quote:

quote:
Originally posted by Mike James
Haha... I know parents who buy CRACK for their kids... and condoms! Pathetic, really.

Sean, federal child safety law mandates that kids be buckled in. If a police officer catches your kids without belts on, you can be arrested. I don't suggest calling in a license plate, though, as nothing can really be done about it if an officer doesn't see it.

With hitting... I don't think there is ANY context under which physical punishment is needed. My views are a bit skewed, I suppose, as my parents just love to beat me up, and I deal with kids almost daily who are physically abused. Any form of physical punishment for anything sends a message that hitting is OK (with younger children) and that you like to hurt your kid (in older children). If a strong statement must be made, make it strong... but don't hit.

NOW, heres an addition to the list: parents who let their kids squirm all over the place and disturb people in church... and parents who let their kids sit and cry their lungs out. Goodness, if your kid is crying, TAKE THEM OUT TO THE CRY-ROOM!


Calling in a license plate can work and has worked....if there is a patrol car in the area and they are not on a way to another call....they may very well (and have) located where you are at and pulled the person over and gave them a citation.

Trust me...it has happened and can work....Im not saying it always will....but it has before in the department I worked in.....never say never.


Old Post 10-14-2003 09:21 AM
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sothinbelle
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post #10  quote:

KIDS IN THE CAR
there was an old episode of COPS where a man had 5 kids int he front seat of an old pickup truck and one of the kids actually fell out onto the street when her went to pull off froma stop light!

SPANKINGS
Abuse is wrong!...spanking as a last resort to unruly behavior is acceptable.

GENDER CUSTODY DECISIONS
a little off the subject..I work at a job that deals with viewing peoples' credit and financial records and as much ridicule as we give men who don't pay child support. Statistically women are much worse. No one pays attention to fathers who are set to receive child support because they are a smaller percentage. We don't pay attention to those cases when the man is struggling to make ends meet, but we should because many women are getting away with murder.

A friend of mine works at a state collection agency for such cases and she has confirmed that male custodians get the short end of the stick.


Old Post 10-29-2003 03:06 PM
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post #11  quote:

Spseaking of parents who should be punished...I watched the news last night and heard about this case...It made me sick to my stomach....


N.J. Officials Probe Malnourishment Of Adopted Boys
Governor Says He's Outraged


POSTED: 11:21 a.m. EST October 27, 2003
UPDATED: 7:12 p.m. EST October 27, 2003

TRENTON, N.J. -- New Jersey Gov. Jim McGreevey on Monday promised a full investigation into the shocking discovery of four severely malnourished boys.

The boys' adoptive parents, Vanessa Jackson, 48, and Raymond Jackson, 50, of Collingswood, N.J., were arrested Friday and were being held on four counts of aggravated assault and 14 counts of child endangerment.

Camden County prosecutor Vincent Sarubbi said that, while most of the children did have pre-existing medical conditions when the couple (pictured, left) adopted them, those conditions could not have caused this type of growth retardation and malnourishment.

The oldest of the boys, 19-year-old Bruce Jackson, was just 4 feet tall and weighed just 45 pounds when he was found earlier this month.

Authorities say that over the past five years, the couple systematically tortured their four adopted sons, ages 19, 14, 10 and 9, by nearly starving them.

McGreevey said state authorities are determining whether a caseworker from the state Division of Youth and Family Services ignored evidence of the boys being starved.

"It's inconceivable how a case worker could go there and not detect these atrocious conditions," he said.

The investigation began three weeks ago when neighbor Michael Byrd called police after finding Bruce digging through his trash can, searching for food. Byrd thought Bruce was about 10 years old.

"His teeth were completely rotted out. You could see the bones on his face when he talked," Byrd said.

Byrd said he gave Bruce a TastyKake, which he said the teenager "inhaled," not even stopping to chew.

Prosecutors said Bruce weighed only 45 pounds when Byrd found him and that the three other adopted sons were also severely underweight and malnourished.

Authorities said the boys were locked out of the kitchen and fed a diet of uncooked pancake batter, peanut butter and jelly and cereal. The boys told investigators that they also gnawed on wallboard and insulation.

Also in the house were three young girls -- two adopted girls and one whose adoption was pending. All the girls appeared to be in good health. The Jacksons' biological son and daughter, both in their 20s, also lived in the home.

All of the children are in foster care, except for Bruce, who remains hospitalized. Authorities said that all of the boys have gained about 7 pounds over the past 2 weeks since they have been under medical care.

Division Of Youth And Family Services Under Microscope

Social workers from the state Division of Youth and Family Services visited the home at least 38 times, state officials said.

McGreevey's child advocate -- appointed earlier this year after a fatal child abuse case in Newark -- will investigate and subpoena workers if needed, he said.

The investigation will focus on actions by DYFS managers who should have been aware of the conditions, McGreevey said. Eight workers have been suspended and more suspensions will follow, he said.

The lead caseworker resigned after prosecutors filed charges against the parents.

"People who made bad decisions will be held accountable," McGreevey said.

Friends, Family Didn't Observe Abuse

The children's uncle said the abuse charges are groundless.

"(The children had) some type of either a drug addiction or some alcohol issue, eating disorders. They're taken care of. It is the result of the disease that they had. It (had) nothing to do with being neglected," William Jackson said.

According to investigators, the children were home-schooled, which is why teachers and students didn't notice their medical conditions.

But the family did attend church regularly, and the church's pastor said he never noticed anything wrong.

"All I can tell you is I'm shocked," said the Rev. Dr. Harry Thomas.

Thomas said the Jackson family has been part of his congregation for the past 15 years.

"All I'm saying is the Jacksons that are being portrayed are not the Jacksons that 350 people in our church know and love," Thomas said.

Thomas said he never saw any indication the boys were hungry.

"We have picnics, snacks during Sunday School. They didn't act like they were starving," Thomas said.

A fund has been established for the boys. If you would like to contribute, send a check to:

Collingswood Cares For Its Children
c/o First Colonial National Bank
Attn: Gerard Banmiller
1040 Haddon Ave., Collingswood, N.J.


Friends and family didnt observe abuse???? Did you notice the weight on these kids? When I saw their pictures, I thought they ranged at 6 years old and less....the 19 year old looked 6 years old...he was just 4 feet tall and weighed just 45 pounds...C'mon!! and they didnt notice something was wrong?? Give me a break!


Old Post 10-29-2003 08:34 PM
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fuscia is Away
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post #12  quote:

It is unfortunate that people are afraid to step up and call the authorities. Children need protection. Those poor kids.

Old Post 10-30-2003 12:12 AM
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post #13  quote:

I work in an office, and some people say I am stuck-up or pretentious or whatever, but my motto is "A place for everything and everything in it's place". I hate parents who come in to the office and just put their kids on the floor and let them run riot, your child is your responsibility and you should make sure he stays out of trouble.

I had one instance where I had on my desk one of those pointy things you stab receipts on to when they are voided (sorry, dont knmow what you call them) and someone's kid picked it up while I wasn't looking and nearly stabbed herself in the eye with it. The mother tried to blame me for having it on my desk, telling me watch out and how would i feel if she had tripped and impaled herslef on it, etc.

If she had been watching what her daughter was doing, it wouldn't have happened at all. Don't try and blame me for your bad parenting.


Old Post 11-04-2003 06:30 AM
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