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Lawless
All About Brad!
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Registered: Jun 2003
Local time: 03:17 PM
Location: Freezing in Colorado
Posts: 27144
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fuscia said this in post #30 :
I think that most people wrongly assume that you are giving lip service when you make a statement like that. I have a relative who can not have children because of having cancer earlier in her life. She honestly would take a baby if they would let her. There are people out there who are kind and loving. It is a sad commentary on our society that we are so quick to assume that people are insincere. |
I also had cancer in my mid 20's, and now, can't have a baby. I would LOVE to adopt a child. But hey... Heck got it right, there is way too much red tape to go through. And, on top of that, being a lesbian makes it harder. There are so many people out there who are just dying, inside, to be able to raise a child... but, the gov't makes you jump through hoops before that happens. They come into your homes, and disect you, and your living situation. When a women gets pregnant, that doesn't happen... and she could be living in a cardboard box for all they care. Adoption needs to be a little bit more open for people who have a deep desire to become a parent, and can't.
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03-20-2006 05:44 PM
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The Writer
Crackerjack
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Registered: Feb 2006
Local time: 06:17 PM
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 149
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Lawless said this in post #32 :
I also had cancer in my mid 20's, and now, can't have a baby. I would LOVE to adopt a child. But hey... Heck got it right, there is way too much red tape to go through.
***Heck's got it right??? I thought he was advocating abortion. If there was less abortion, there'd be less red tape.
And, on top of that, being a lesbian makes it harder. There are so many people out there who are just dying, inside, to be able to raise a child... but, the gov't makes you jump through hoops before that happens. They come into your homes, and disect you, and your living situation. When a women gets pregnant, that doesn't happen... and she could be living in a cardboard box for all they care. Adoption needs to be a little bit more open for people who have a deep desire to become a parent, and can't. |
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03-20-2006 05:54 PM
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USA1
INReview Maven
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Registered: Mar 2003
Local time: 05:17 PM
Location:
Posts: 4322
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Lawless said this in post #32 :
I also had cancer in my mid 20's, and now, can't have a baby. I would LOVE to adopt a child. But hey... Heck got it right, there is way too much red tape to go through. And, on top of that, being a lesbian makes it harder. There are so many people out there who are just dying, inside, to be able to raise a child... but, the gov't makes you jump through hoops before that happens. They come into your homes, and disect you, and your living situation. When a women gets pregnant, that doesn't happen... and she could be living in a cardboard box for all they care. Adoption needs to be a little bit more open for people who have a deep desire to become a parent, and can't. |
Adoption agencies are money making institutions. The costs to adopt are out of the question for most Americans. It's not that these children are unwanted. It's that they are so expensive. To me it's just like selling people. Babies that have trouble have costs associated with them from hospitals and the like but, there thousands that require little or no medical attention and the cost should be offset by them. Unfortunately it's not.
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03-20-2006 05:56 PM
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nikiTa
Definitively Illumined
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Registered: Jun 2004
Local time: 07:47 PM
Location:
Posts: 7329
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USA1 said this in post #36 :
Adoption agencies are money making institutions. The costs to adopt are out of the question for most Americans. It's not that these children are unwanted. It's that they are so expensive. To me it's just like selling people. Babies that have trouble have costs associated with them from hospitals and the like but, there thousands that require little or no medical attention and the cost should be offset by them. Unfortunately it's not. |
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Lawless said this in post #37 :
You're right USA1... it is VERY costly. And that makes it so people can't adopt a child. I don't have thousands of dollars to take in a child. But, I have a heart to love an unwanted child, and give them a home, and a family, and a better life than being passed around from foster home, to home... or orphanage, etc...
Maybe someday our gov't will look at that, and see that children would be much better if they were placed in a home, instead of being lost in the system... a system that doesn't really care about them. |
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fuscia said this in post #41 :
There are not that many infants for adoption. There are plenty of older children up for adoption in our country, but they are overlooked. |
Excellent points.
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03-21-2006 01:29 AM
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nikiTa
Definitively Illumined
offline
Registered: Jun 2004
Local time: 07:47 PM
Location:
Posts: 7329
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gaboman said this in post #19 :
"Should the child die for the sins of the father?" - that is such a horrible thing to wish upon a rape victim. Being a man, I'm ashamed that another man would be so insensitive... but that's neither here nor there, you are indeed allowed your opinion.
But the only way I can see your view is like this: a woman, raped, a traumatic ordeal indeed (hardly think you can argue that point). Then she's suddenly pregnant; an abortion is a hard thing to go through with, and it will most likely scar them for life. But that scar won't be anywhere near as deep as it would be if they had to see the product of their rape each and every day for the rest of their life. I mean, they may love the child completely; but at the back of their mind that child would still be a subtle reminder of how they were humiliated - reduced to a mass of fleshy desire and conquored by some twisted individual.
It makes me sick just thinking about it. |
I really don't think that is the issue in a woman's mind gaboman.
An unplanned baby because of someone else's brutality and now you have to not only deal with the trauma of the rape, but also , How am I going to support this baby? How can I raise it?
In such a society as ours that demeans rape victims over and over again...blaming women for being raped in court room after court room...
can you hear someone say offhandedly..."Where is the father? Who is the father?"
Her honest response would be..."Oh, he raped me and got me pregnant. And since it was 'my fault' he doesn't have to spend child support, nor does he have to spend any time behind bars."
But you are right about one thing Gaboman...I find the writer very insensitive and kudos and a pat on the back to you for having more tact with him than I am not allowed to do.
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03-21-2006 01:34 AM
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I'll talk to someone about that.
a person might consider giving the child up for adoption
