| EVERYONE READ THIS
Emergency Memo - June 2004: While Warner Brothers Studios prepares to release another installment of Satanic filth in the form of "Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban," True Christians™ are working to raise awareness among unsaved filmgoers that recent events at the Iraqi Prison in Azkaban can be no coincidence. Satan has timed events in Iraq with the release of his latest film as a marketing gimmick spawned in the deepest pits of Hell. Church members are asked to pray steadfastly that President Bush will not allow this film to be released in America.
Emergency Memo - June 2003: Churches to hold all night prayer vigils to counter thousands of Harry Potter Black Masses being held across America! National Bookstores to release the Devil's latest manuscript at midnight! Pray for our children! With each new release, a seal to Satan's Lair is opened. This is the fifth seal! Be vigilant! The time is at hand!
Emergency Memo - November 2001: Landover Baptist Pastors encourage Bible believing churches across America to return to their roots, and re-institute the Godly early church practice of book burning. Learn how to organize a book burning in your community - click here.
Emergency Memo - November 2001: Landover Baptist holds the largest book burning in American history. Over 1.5 million Harry Potter books were burned in the church parking lot after evening services. Reports say that the flames were so high they could be seen from as far away as Des Moines.
Emergency Memo - October 1999: Reports of coven sightings in the woods around Freehold, Iowa prompt pastors to investigate. Creation Scientists conclude that a new generation of witches are being trained in the dark arts of Wicca through an instruction manual called, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone. Pastor Deacon Fred enlists Demon Hunter, Mitch Walker, to begin instructing church members on how to stalk, hunt, capture, detain and deprogram Wiccans.
EVERYONE READ THIS!!!!!!
Freehold, Iowa - This memo is being sent to all church members and concerned Christians to inform them of a disease that is infecting our Nation. Landover Baptist parents must be made aware of a particularly dangerous series of books that have somehow slipped into our children's hands, unnoticed. Lately, teachers at Landover Baptist Elementary school have been complaining that youngsters have been prancing about in an 'odd and peculiar manner'. Some of God's children have been stealing yellow crayons and painting lightning bolts on their foreheads. Many of them have been hiding in boxes and refuse to come out unless cookies and milk are delivered on a silver plate. We believe this behavior to be far from innocent. It is absolutely and without question, demonic, in origin.
We have traced the source of these problems to a series of best selling books in the secular world. The Harry Potter book series is filled with fantastic images of hell, Catholicism, sissyism, and liberalism. We are also told that there is a movie series based on the books, and children are lining up to see it like lemmings, eager to be boot-kicked off the Heavenly cliff by Jesus himself, into the lake of fire! The entire premise of each book rests in the anti-Christian notion that the sissified lifestyle is to be glorified and accepted by all. They make sissies out to be heroes, and encourage children to escape into their own private make-believe worlds. They encourage youngsters to run away from their problems and escape the world by creating destructive and dangerous fantasies.
All True Christians™ believe that Harry Potter books challenge both saved and unsaved children to create demonically inspired worlds in their innocent little heads. We also believe that the books encourage youngsters to run off and hide. Christian parents are telling us that their children refuse to sit at the family table for dinner, instead they eat their dinner behind a locked closet door or under their beds. We are asking all Landover Baptist Church members at this time to search every room in your Christian home for any sign of these Harry Potter books. If you find them, keep them out of the child's reach. Put them on a high shelf until next Saturday when we as a church body will join together in unison for an impromptu book burning on the East lawn. After the burning, if any of these 'so-called' children's books are found anywhere on church grounds or in the home of any church member, proper steps will be taken to ensure your child is fully deprogrammed from the illicit material (which may or may not include a trip to a Russian orphanage at your expense) and you will be fined $250.00 per book. The fines are effective after the book burning. Mandatory attendance is required as you volunteer to help us fight Satan in his attempt to strike at the future of Christian America by worming his way into the hearts and minds of our precious and innocent children!
Note to all Concerned Parents:
We have it on good Godly authority that the 6th book in the series will reveal that the main character, "Harry Potter" actually KILLED HIS PARENTS! with a butcher knife! If this isn't enough to raise the hair on your neck, then you need revival! Find out what other Christians are saying about this filth by clicking here! | |
