How to liven up Thanksgiving

Holidays Forum

• Open the oven, shove hunks of velveeta into the turkey while it cooks. Tell mom it adds the coolest flavor.
  
  
• Shoot olive pits at Grandpa's glasses (just pinch them in your fingers and they FLY!!)
  
  
• Whenever someone at the table says a word beginning with the letter R, make a loud "BUZZ"ing noise.
  
  
• Bring along old recorded football games, pop them in the VCR when Dad's not looking.
  
  
• Suck your cranberry sauce loudly through a straw.
  
  
• Bring a date that only talks about her/his spouse at home.
  
  
• Hold your nose while you eat.
  
  
• Recite the tragic and abusive conditions known to exist at turkey farms.
  
  
• Mid-meal turn to you mom and say, "See mom, I told you they wouldn't notice, you were worried for nothing."
  
  
• Load your plate up high, then take it to the kitchen, toss it all in the blender, and take your "shake" back to the table.

I love that one, where you say the comment to your mom!!

Can you just imagine the faces of your loved ones! LMAO

Oh dear god... that scene cracks me up over and over, each time I see it. He's the Doritos guy... and he does such a good job at that part. I love when he's "stuffing" the turkey!

Courtesy of David Letterman:

Top Ten Signs the Person Answering the Butterball Turkey Hotline is Nuts


10. Starts out by asking, "What are you wearing?"

9. Keeps referring to product called "Vicks Vap-O-Gravy"

8. Recommends thawing the turkey in your pants

7. Wants you to look inside the turkey for contact lens he lost at the processing plant

6. When you ask, "How often should I baste it?" he says, "Are we still talking about the turkey?"

5. Tells you that when the timer pops up, you have ten seconds before the damn thing explodes

4. Insists you cook turkey at six degrees for 450 hours

3. Keeps interrupting to ask if you're planning to eat the bird or wear it as a hat

2. Claims to have sailed from New York to the Bahamas in a gravy boat

1. He tells you to go stuff yourself

LMAO... yall got me dying.....omg. ok just breathe. ok...lol